Three Steps to Personal Development for Spouses of Childhood Sexual Abuse Survivors
The principles that govern my work with husbands include the necessity of self-awareness, self-care, and personal development. The trauma inflicted by childhood sexual abuse and the long-term effects endured by survivors of abuse imposes unwanted challenges for both the survivor and spouse. I work with husbands of childhood sexual abuse survivors, helping them navigate in […]
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How does Homeland Security Inform the Prevention of Childhood Sexual Abuse?
The prevalence of Childhood Sexual Abuse continues at a disturbing rate yet remains ignored or disbelieved by too many in our society. Some people give the “deer in the headlights” look when they hear that at least one-in-four women and at least one-in-six men are sexually abused before age 18. They live in ignorance about […]
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Three Vital Truths for Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse
I’ve recently been diagnosed with cancer. Though it was unexpected and obviously uninvited, I’ve been journaling many valuable lessons and embracing some new perspectives. Because of my work in Marriage Reconstruction Ministries, I began noticing parallels between a diagnosis of cancer and being a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. In this article I hope to […]
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How Do You Argue With Your Spouse?
When Glen and Brenda disagree and argue, their interaction is predictable. He points his finger at her. She cowers in silence. It is not unusual for victims of childhood sexual abuse to be silent in conflict. But a predictable style of arguing is typical of everyone, whether or not there is abuse in their background. […]
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What Expectations Should I Have In My Marriage?
A husband recently asked me, “What should I have as expectations in my marriage?” Most of us (both husbands and wives), entered our marriage with great expectations. Our wedding vows often provide insight into some of those expectations. When you said, “for better for worse, in sickness and in health,” what were you expecting? I’ll […]
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How to Respond When the Topic of “Childhood Sexual Abuse” Becomes a Conversation Stopper
“What do you do for a living?” or “What do you do?” One of these questions is often asked when people are first getting acquainted. My answer to that question is, “Among the things I do, my wife and I lead a ministry that helps husbands and wives rebuild their marriage that has been affected […]
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Here’s What Many People Say When They Hear the Words “Childhood Sexual Abuse”
How do people respond to you when you say, “I was sexually abused as a child,” or when you say, “My wife was sexually abused as a child?” I am curious and sometimes saddened by peoples’ responses when the topic of childhood sexual abuse is mentioned. If someone close to you is a survivor of […]
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Three Styles of Response When Your Wife is a Survivor of Childhood Sexual Abuse
What is it like for you as a husband whose wife was sexually abused as a child? Imagine that you and I are having coffee at a local café in your town (I wish that were possible). Given the vast and various effects of childhood sexual abuse, your situation might not warrant all of the […]
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An Insightful Response to a Survivor’s Loss
Grant recently told me of a loss that his wife had experienced. The lost item had significant financial value. Grant’s wife, Callie, is a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. Grant and Callie, not their real names, have both given me permission to share this incident that offers insights into wives who are survivors of childhood […]
Take a TourSeasonal Triggers: Our Bodies Remember
My calendar says it is Spring. The view outside my window says otherwise; I live in a northern state. But spring is coming. Many trauma survivors – including survivors of childhood sexual abuse – are aware that spring is coming because of their body’s response to the meteorological conditions that come with spring. Our bodies […]
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