...helping men and women rebuild marriages affected by a wife's childhood sexual abuse.

Close Icon
Contact Info     bill@marriagereconstruction.com

Category Archives: Childhood Sexual Abuse

Two Steps to Managing Yourself in the Trauma (Part 2 of “Have you Experienced the Contagious Nature of Trauma?”)

 “Trauma overwhelms the brain’s organizational system” according to psychotherapist Steven Levenkron in his book Stolen Tomorrows. The trauma alters the brain’s normal perceptions for those who were sexually abused as children. These alterations are not necessarily permanent but they are profound (p. 152). With childhood sexual abuse (CSA), the brain’s ability to keep the traumatic experience […]

Take a Tour 

Have you Experienced the Contagious Nature of Trauma? (Part 1)

My interviews with husbands whose wives are victims of childhood sexual abuse (CSA) consistently revealed that trauma is not insulated or isolated with their wives. Researchers Carolyn Maltas and Joseph Shay’s extensive study of the contagious nature of trauma was reported in their work, “Trauma Contagion in Partners of Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse” in […]

Take a Tour 

Here’s how you might avoid accidentally pulling the trigger on your wife

In my research of husbands whose wives were victims of childhood sexual abuse (CSA), social relationship conflict was at the top of the list – even surpassing sexual frustration – as the most problematic issue in their marriage. A common word used by husbands in my interviews was trigger, referring to how a simple conversation […]

Take a Tour 

Three best responses when it appears your wife’s perpetrator gets to go free

The man who robbed my wife of her childhood innocence recently died. Like many perpetrators who work to build their reputation in the community and even in the church, he went to his grave admired by some and abhorred by others. Survivors of childhood sexual abuse are not always able to bring their perpetrator to […]

Take a Tour 

Self-Check on our own Health (Part 3)

Before considering the third self-check, I want you to know that I welcome your comments and feedback on any of these blogs or thoughts that you have for the MarriageReconstruction website. At this stage, your comments will not appear publicly with the blog. But I’d appreciate hearing from you personally as we learn together. To […]

Take a Tour 

Self-Check on our own Health (Part 2)

Self-Check on our own Health (Part 2) The self-check for emotional and relational health is based on the principle that it can be prosperous to strive for a healthy relationship and preposterous to seek a normal relationship. Striving for a healthy relationship begins with us as husbands. This blog is the second of a 3-part […]

Take a Tour 

Self-Check on our own Health (Part 1)

Have you done a self-check on your own emotional health recently?  This is the first “self-check” in a 3 part series … In my last blog I stated that it can be prosperous to strive for a healthy relationship and preposterous to seek a normal relationship. Since striving for a healthy relationship must begin with […]

Take a Tour 

What is a normal marriage anyway?

I thought I had a normal marriage. My wife and I had normal children, normal celebrations, normal habits, normal communication, normal sex, and normal arguments. Then, ten years into our marriage, my wife disclosed her childhood sexual abuse (CSA). Her disclosure was a defining moment in our marriage. Once we got into some counseling, we […]

Take a Tour 

Three Insights From My Counselor

As the husband of a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, I’ve gone back to a counselor at different stages of my journey. Because of multiple situations converging in my life, I’ve been seeing a counselor in the Milwaukee area in recent months. I’m passing along to you some of the principles he has been working […]

Take a Tour