...helping men and women rebuild marriages affected by a wife's childhood sexual abuse.

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Category Archives: Trauma

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Can We Trust Psychology?

My wife and I recently conducted another weekend conference for Marriage Reconstruction Ministries that focused on the effects of childhood sexual abuse and how the survivor can be “Moving from a Shattered Past to a Strengthened Future.” During the two-day event, we offered some time for Q&A. One of the questions was, “Psychology seems founded […]

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Here’s why your wife cannot “just get over” her childhood sexual abuse

Clark Barshinger, in Haunted Marriage, calls childhood sexual abuse “murder of the psyche.” The depth of psychological injury from childhood sexual abuse and the long-term existence of its manifestations surpass the effects of most other forms of trauma. The notion that survivors “just get over it” ignores the trauma of abuse and the intricately intertwined […]

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How should husbands respond to their wives’ dissociation?

Tina Zahn experienced dissociative moments common to many survivors of childhood sexual abuse. In her book, Why I Jumped, Tina described how her stepfather ordered her to their dark and dingy basement. She recalled how she hated her stepfather’s breathing, being held down by him, and the smells that emitted from him. As her stepfather […]

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My wife experienced childhood sexual abuse: 3 Truths to Inhale when Resilience Runs Out

If your wife has experienced childhood sexual abuse, there are three truths to inhale when your resilience runs out!

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Childhood sexual abuse: Do you have a “go to” truth in troubling seasons?

Husbands of wives who have experienced childhood sexual abuse can be haunted and taunted by the effects that directly affect their wives!

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Childhood sexual abuse & marriage: I want my wife back!

Men who are married to victims of childhood sexual abuse might experience a marriage in which it seems like they’ve been married to two different women, especially if their wife’s disclosure of the abuse occurred several years into their marriage. Brent’s wife was outgoing and adventurous during the first ten years of their marriage. But […]

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Fitting childhood sexual abuse into a biblical worldview

Last week, I once again compiled a list of the effects of childhood sexual abuse. Each time I make a list, I am reminded of how broad sweeping and deeply troubling are the effects of childhood sexual abuse. Don’t just read the following list. Take time to consider the traumatic impact of childhood sexual abuse. […]

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When will this trauma finally be over? (Part 2)

This is Part II of a 2-part blog dealing with a question asked by husbands married to wives who are victims of childhood sexual abuse (CSA). We husbands wonder, “When will this trauma finally be over?” The late Yogi Berra was known for his memorable twists of phrases. Yogi once said, “You’ve got to be […]

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Childhood Sexual Abuse & Marriage: When will this trauma finally be over?

Husbands married to wives who are victims of childhood sexual abuse (CSA) want to know where they are on the journey of healing and when they’ll get to the destination of resolve. So they ask: When will this finally be over? When will we get through this? How long will this take? The emotional pain […]

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Childhood sexual abuse: A trauma we should not forget

Last Thursday at 7:46 AM (ET), I joined with countless others by pausing for a few moments to pray for people I’ve never met but people I’ll never forget – the families who lost loved ones in the 9/11 attack on the World Trade Center. I remember the words spoken during the days following 9/11; […]

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