...helping men and women rebuild marriages affected by a wife's childhood sexual abuse.

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Category Archives: Trauma

What led these men to their indecent behaviors?

On the heels of the recent #MeToo trend, an increasing number of accusations of childhood sexual abuse, sexual assault, and sexual harassment have been brought against Hollywood celebrities, news media personnel, and politicians. All of the accused, up to this point and to my knowledge, have been male. My wife recently asked, “What made these […]

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Responding to Disclosures of Sexual Abuse & Assault

In the current issue of Time, editorialist Laurie Penny identified questions that many people are prone to ask in response to the recent #MeToo trend; the declaration of being a victim of childhood sexual abuse, sexual assault, or sexual harassment. Could this [referring to childhood sexual abuse, sexual assault, and sexual harassment] really have been […]

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Childhood Sexual Abuse: How to Respond to the Distorted Perceptions of Survivors

Childhood sexual abuse inflicts and imprints a distorted lens through which the survivor interprets – or misinterprets – life. The distortion affects the survivor’s perception of life, God, men, themselves, sexuality, etc. It is difficult to identify an aspect of human life not affected by this imprint. That is not to say that all survivors […]

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Can We Trust Psychology?

My wife and I recently conducted another weekend conference for Marriage Reconstruction Ministries that focused on the effects of childhood sexual abuse and how the survivor can be “Moving from a Shattered Past to a Strengthened Future.” During the two-day event, we offered some time for Q&A. One of the questions was, “Psychology seems founded […]

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Here’s why your wife cannot “just get over” her childhood sexual abuse

Clark Barshinger, in Haunted Marriage, calls childhood sexual abuse “murder of the psyche.” The depth of psychological injury from childhood sexual abuse and the long-term existence of its manifestations surpass the effects of most other forms of trauma. The notion that survivors “just get over it” ignores the trauma of abuse and the intricately intertwined […]

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How should husbands respond to their wives’ dissociation?

Tina Zahn experienced dissociative moments common to many survivors of childhood sexual abuse. In her book, Why I Jumped, Tina described how her stepfather ordered her to their dark and dingy basement. She recalled how she hated her stepfather’s breathing, being held down by him, and the smells that emitted from him. As her stepfather […]

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My wife experienced childhood sexual abuse: 3 Truths to Inhale when Resilience Runs Out

If your wife has experienced childhood sexual abuse, there are three truths to inhale when your resilience runs out!

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Childhood sexual abuse: Do you have a “go to” truth in troubling seasons?

Husbands of wives who have experienced childhood sexual abuse can be haunted and taunted by the effects that directly affect their wives!

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Childhood sexual abuse & marriage: I want my wife back!

Men who are married to victims of childhood sexual abuse might experience a marriage in which it seems like they’ve been married to two different women, especially if their wife’s disclosure of the abuse occurred several years into their marriage. Brent’s wife was outgoing and adventurous during the first ten years of their marriage. But […]

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Fitting childhood sexual abuse into a biblical worldview

Last week, I once again compiled a list of the effects of childhood sexual abuse. Each time I make a list, I am reminded of how broad sweeping and deeply troubling are the effects of childhood sexual abuse. Don’t just read the following list. Take time to consider the traumatic impact of childhood sexual abuse. […]

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